April 19, 2012

Currently, in my job, I don’t have the opportunity to do much couples counseling.  However, recently I find myself in the position of being the resident couples counselor and having a grand ol’ time returning to the counseling of my roots.  Of course most of it is colored with the underlying issue of alcoholism or addiction but nevertheless it’s couples counseling.

In a facility where 4/5 of the population is adolescent, we don’t really see a lot of people coming through that are in committed relationships, even those of us that work with the 1/5 that are adults.  Unfortunately, in my line of work I get exposed to the most fractured relationships and the most traumatic stories.  I feel truly blessed to come home to a man that loves me.

This little note was prompted by the fact that I reading my dad’s blog today.  http://www.pastordeaton.blogspot.com/ if you want to go check it out.  In his personal information on the right hand side it had a section that asked about who his heroes were.  He listed them in this order:  Jesus Christ, my dad, Dawn Deaton, my children, Jack Bauer.

For those of you who are unaware, Dawn Deaton is my mother.  My dad views my mom as one of his heroes.  I think that is one of the best things I’ve heard ever.  I grew up watching my parents model what it meant to have a husband be the head of the family yet have a marriage where they were equal partners.  It was a beautiful balance.  My mother would defer to my dad but my dad would never make a major decision without seeking out my mother.

My mother is a remarkable women, though she doesn’t think so, which makes her even more remarkable.  She did not have a storybook childhood yet instead of carrying that on to her children, she made a decision to make the effort to not do things the same way.  When the small church that my dad pastored could no longer support a family of four, my mom willingly moved across the country away from her 5 sisters and her best friend that she had since the 8th grade.  When my father got a new church in Connecticut, she stayed in Texas with two kids by herself for two months just so we could finish the school year.  She has had two knee replacements and after the last surgery was up walking around the nurses’ station THE SAME DAY.  My mom does not have a college education yet she is sought after for counsel on personal and theological matters frequently and for good reason.  She has earned the respect of people seeking her out.

To be honest, I wasn’t surprised when I saw that my dad listed my mom as a hero.  I was more surprised by the reference to his children.  I guess I’ve been a little jaded lately with my work and God led me to my father’s blog at just the right time.  I needed to be reminded of the husbands out there that lift up their wives for the heroes they are.

Especially my mom.

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