May 25, 2012

It was a regular Monday night.  Hubby came home from work and I was off to spend some time with my girlfriends. I was there a short time when my phone rang and it was hubby.  I half rolled my eyes because it seems like every time I leave the house he is calling me for something. Usually it's for a silly question like, "Is there anymore formula?" or, "Where's Cole's toothbrush?" The last time I was at a girls night he called me about 5 times in a row. After the fifth time he called I said, "Don't call me unless one of the kids is bleeding or in serious trouble."

So like I said the phone was ringing and it was hubbs. I walk outside to answer the phone so as not to disturb anyone. That's when I hear my oldest child crying.  This is not an un-common sound, but this time it was different.  He was screaming like something was hurting him.  I was holding my breath as Preston began to speak. 

"Cole was choking.  I left the room to answer a work phone call, and a minute later Cole walked into the room and I could tell something was wrong.  I dropped the phone and ran over to him.  I couldn't get the fruit snacks dislodged after trying the Heimlich maneuver, so I shoved my fingers down his throat and forced them down.  On the way back up I felt one go up into his nasal cavity.  I think it's still up there.  His nose is bleeding, what do I do?"

At this point I'm shaken not only because my husband just told me that our son was choking, but I'm upset because of the way he is crying.  Something isn't right.  The next few moments are a blur.  I left the party crying, and cried hysterically for the 20 minutes it took me to get home. Once I reached our house my in laws were already there along with their good friends, and the pastors of the church we attend, Greg and Debbie.

I rush into the house and my Mother in Law and husband are consoling Cole.  I try not to cry in front of him, but I can't help it.  I held him and kissed him, and hugged him.  I could have lost my son.  Now trust me when I say that I'm not dramatic when it comes to my kids.  I'm a nurse so not a lot phases me when it comes to them getting injured.  Couple that with the fact that I'm surrounded by boys and I'm not easily shaken. Believe me when I say I'm a pretty laid back mom. This time is different though. This wasn't your average boo-boo. My son could have lost his life.

After things calm down a bit we decide it's best to take him to the Dr. because we are not sure if he has something stuck in his nasal cavity.  His face is slightly swollen, his nose is draining all kinds of fluid and he can't breathe out of his nose.  This is where my pastor saved the day. Unbeknownst to me before I walked in our Pastor gave hubby $100 to cover the Dr's visit.  We are currently working on obtaining insurance, but the fact is we don't have any coverage yet.  $100 is a lot of money to us right now.  I'm staying at home with our kids, and we are recovering financially from a difficult year.

I didn't know about this until later that night.  After leaving the Dr's office
hubby told me what Pastor Greg did for us.  I was floored.  I guess you would "expect" a pastor to do something like that right?  Well I didn't expect it at all.  I was humbled and beyond thankful.  My respect level for him grew.  Not that I didn't respect him before.  Of course I think he is great. I love our church, I love his family, I'm friends with all of his kids, and some of his grandchildren are the same age as Cole. They have also been nothing but awesome friends to my In Laws.  My point is that he didn't have to do that, but he did.  He  put into practice what he preaches.  Literally.  A stressful situation, became a lot less stressful. Thank you does not cover it, but THANK YOU GREG.

The good news is that my child is alive and well and there is no sign that he has a fruit snack lodged in his nasal cavity. Initially the doc said that it's very possible that there could be a fruit snack lodged up there but we would need to do an MRI.  For the time being he didn't feel like that was necessary.  He was confident that either A. the fruit snack would dissolve, or B. it would come down on it's own.  His advice was to watch him, and with my medical background I was comfortable with that. We went home and slept peacefully that night.

I couldn't help but dwell on all the "what ifs" the day or 2 after.  Cole slept in our bed that night. The following  morning I thought about the fact that I could have been waking up that day without him. I shudder to think what would have happened if Cole had not walked into our bedroom to let daddy know something was wrong. What if shoving the fruit snacks down his throat didn't work?  What would I have done?  In those moments while Cole was laying next to me I thought about all the times I walk out of the room and leave my children alone.  It's not something I do often, but a girl has got to pee from time to time.  I thought about all the times we go to the pool, and how easily he could drown.  I thought about the few times he has run into the street with me running behind him yelling for him to stop. My mind was running rampant with doubts about not only my parenting, but hubby's as well.

Then I had a thought that put it all into perspective.  God is in control. He has entrusted Cole to me, and he will take him when he wants to.  Of course I hope that my children live longer than I do, but the fact is that I can't control the number of his days.  The ways in which I can protect him, has it's limits.  I can't be everywhere all of the time, and neither can my husband.   I find peace in that. Of course I have my moments of fear.  I wouldn't be human if I didn't.

So at the end of the day here are the facts.  My husband and my pastor are my hero's.  My children are ok, and fruit snacks are officially banned from this house!  Since then I have watched Cole shove food in his mouth, and then I proceed to tell him, "Small bites Cole." (My dad reminded me after he heard what happened that I need to tell Cole to take small bites. My dad always tells us to take small bites, even as adults, so thanks Dad.) He promptly comes over to me and spits his chewed up food in my hand.  I'm not quite thrilled about that, but hey, its better than the alternative!

I have learned a lot since this incident about safety and things like that, but I will save that for another post, another day, in the near future.  Until then, hug your kids a little tighter today, show a little more patience, and if your hubby and your pastor are your hero
let em know!

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